Fwd: Days 4 & 5

I need to start this post by telling you how wonderful Mattie has been
throughout this whole process. She is loving being a big sister... so
sweet and patient with Kaylee. Playful, attentive, and understanding
when she doesn't get the desired response of affection or cooperation.
It has been a treasure watching them bond and they have their own way
of communicating and interacting. Being Mommy, I think I get about 5
times more hugs than everyone else, and sometimes Kaylee will give
Mattie that "Look who I've got" look when she's sitting on my lap.
Kaylee has learned quickly the power of withholding affection and being
pursued for hugs. After initially giving them to all of us readily, she
has started holding out on Dave & Mattie at times. I told Mattie I
remember Hannah grinning and snubbing Kelsey when they were little when
she tried to hug her, and told her to ignore her when she does that and
be a little more hard to get. Not to be chasing her around saying "Give
sissy a hug", and it has begun to work. Mattie quickly pointed out that
it's like when our little dog Daisy will not stop running when you
chase her no matter how loud you yell or how patient or angry you
get...it's as if you can see her smiling, "catch me if you can!" But if
you turn around and start running in the opposite direction away from
her, she will turn around and follow at break-neck speed. What is this
about human and dog nature?

Day 4 brought the first real meltdown...the shots were nothing in
comparison. Since we had some free time in the AM before our afternoon
apptmt to have her TB test read, I decided to run next door and pick up
some Chinese dresses we had found the day before, and I wanted to do it
quickly by myself. But at the last minute Mattie said she really wanted
to go, so I agreed. I looked forward to having a little alone time with
her and Dave would keep Kaylee and spend some time playing with her and
figuring out this flipside of her attitude, which really was minor all
things considered. She had still been mostly affectionate and obedient
throughout. So we said Bye Bye and headed out the door, but before we
even got on the elevator we could hear her panicky crying and whining,
and Dave in a calm voice trying to soothe her. Apparently, she would
not be consoled. The crying quickly escalated into a fullblown tantrum,
which Dave described as hyperventilation to the edge of barfing, so
after cleaning up all the tears & mucous off of the both of them and
their clothes, he brought her to meet us in the shop. He said that by
the way she behaved, she probably thought we had left her for good, and
we had probably just broken every adoption rule in the book. I embraced
her and told her "Mommy will always come back". Then I kissed her
cheek and she kissed mine, which is another story because we don't
think she had ever been kissed before or even knew what a kiss was.
After we first started kissing her cheek, she would "air kiss" with her
head down. Then I put her little face to my cheek so she could kiss me.
Then Dave, Mattie and I all kissed each other to show her and she
giggled. Now she will randomly kiss us, but also, if she sees something
she likes or wants, she will point to it and "air kiss" Once we found
the vendor with the dresses, she spied some cute, red plastic child's
sunglasses and began "air kissing" as she pointed to them. Whether it
was spoiling her or not, we just could not say no, and she has been
wearing them around ever since, mostly on top of her head like Mommy.
We bought the dresses and the sales girl gave Kaylee a second pink
purse, so now she carries both around. We picked up a few
Chinese/English children's books and returned to the group for our trip
back to the clinic. Fortunately it was brief and uneventful as our
guide explained "no more shots". We had a little time before our
passport apptmt, so our guide had the bus driver drop us off at a
grocery store. What an experience! Dozens of sales girls in uniforms
everywhere, holding and hawking products just like a live TV
commercial from the 1960's, only much louder. Madge with her Palmolive
dishwashing liquid which also softens the hands. Whatever happened to
Madge? I think she moved here to work in her retirement. We rode with
our shopping cart down multiple levels on flat escalators like in the
airport, only they moved up and down instead of horizontally, all along
the sides of which were products for sale, so one can miss no
opportunity to shop while changing floors. After filling our cart with
snacks, batteries, & other necessities, including 2 liters of Coke
Zero, we checked out. The whopping total was about $17 US dollars. Then
it was off to the Passport office to apply for Kaylee's Chinese
Passport. (Once home, we will reapply for a US passport with her new
name.) We returned to the hotel to submit our week's worth of dirty
laundry,then spent the rest of the afternoon/evening exploring Shamian
Island, The White Swan Hotel, a Thai Restaurant, and dessert at a
Starbucks. This is when Kaylee really started to open up to the group
and interact with the other kids. I would no longer characterize her as
"shy". She giggled and played, ran around the hotel, posed for pictures
with her signature peace sign, shared her gum, and held hands with the
other girls, who gave each other piggy back rides all through
Starbucks. Yes, we got a few downward looks at our boisterous American
children, but they had a blast and it was an important time of bonding
for Kaylee, so we just let them go! Day 4 seemed to bring us full
circle!

To be contd...

To be contd...I have to send this before I lose it!